Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore

This is my 123rd post and my last for "Cooking with Alice." I have prepared 102 recipes (which is more than the authors can say) and blogged for each of 117 episodes of the series. Back in June, when I started this, I had no idea what I was getting myself into. Which is a good thing, because if I had been in my right mind I never would have done it. I want to thank all of  you who encouraged and laughed and cried along side of me through this process. At the onset, it didn't seem that life could move forward, but of course it has. There have been highs and lows and a lot of bittersweet (or should I say butter-sweet?) moments in between. The chef Julia Child had the philosophy that laughter was as delicious as food, so if that is the case, everything I made was scrumptious. I am glad to be ending on a high note, like the Mary Tyler Moore Show, rather than being cancelled without notice like The Brady Bunch. I want to especially thank Mark and Julia. Mark is my silent partner and my better half. He kept me going when I so wanted to quit, always reminding me that Denni would never let me hear the end of it if I did. And my own Julia child, whose sweetness and good nature kept us focused, never forgetting the sacrifice of eating nasty food was for Uncle Denni. I wish life were like TV, so I could just wake up next to Suzanne Pleschette and have this all have been a dream, but it isn't, and saying goodbye to Alice is like saying goodbye to Denni, for a second time. I truly felt like he was with me everyday in the kitchen, and I will admit to talking to him on the days things didn't go as planned. In June, I didn't know how I would make it through each day and I needed a crutch, which this blog turned out to be.  As a whole, I have learned a lot about myself and cooking (mostly how not to). This experience has expanded my horizons, we will have to wait and see where it takes me next. Stay tuned.

Episode Note: "Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore" Feeling that the boys need to bond with their new stepmother, Alice defers all requests for band-aids, buttons, and arbitrations to Carol. Carol is elated, making her 'feel like a mother and wife' for the first time since moving in.  Alice does such a good job, that she manuvers herself right out of job, feeling that they no longer need her. She makes up a story about a sick Aunt in Seattle, and turns in her resignation. Everyone is saddened at the prospect of losing Alice, but Carol realizes that Alice just may feel overburdened by the expanded family. Mike thinks he can solve the matter by offereing her a pay raise, which she refuses. But then, Jan and Marcia overhear Alice on the phone telling a friend she's obsolete (like a victrola when the new stereo arrives). They of course blab this to the rest of the family, and the Brady's conspire to show Alice how much she is needed by creating chaos that only she can handle. She sees through the ruse, but realizes there is still a place for her in their home and decides to stay. Good old Alice, always there when you need her the most.

Oahu Pineapple Spice Cake

Today is Mark's birthday and I purposefully saved this one when I realized it would coincide with my last recipe post. Two year's ago, when he turned 50, it also happened to be the 50th anniversary of Hawaii's statehood, so we had a "Mark 5-0" Hawaiian luau. Since then, he always wants a tropical birthday, and since we are going to Hawaii in February, I thought it fitting. Had Denni not gotten ill, we never would have planned the trip, although we talked about it often. When he was diagnosed, it jolted us into living for the moment, and left us with the feeling that we didn't want to someday look back and say we should have gone, but didn't. That said, pineapple cake. Flour, eggs, oil, cinnamon, nutmeg, sugars (white and brown), and pineapple baked in a Bundt pan. The best part is the icing, with among the sugar also includes rum and a lot of butter. The other two cakes from Alice had mixed results, but I was feeling hopeful about this one. Of course, the recipe directions were less than complete, but why should today be any different? I am on to Alice, and she cannot out smart me. We also had an all hors d'oeuvres dinner, because there isn't anything Mark wouldn't do for a platter of pu-pu.

Episode Note: "Hawaii Bound" The first of the three part Hawaiian epic. Mike has a big construction project he is overseeing in Oahu and takes the whole family along for the ride. Everything is coming up hibiscus for the Brady's in paradise.They take a whirlwind tour of the island, including Diamond Head and a solemn visit to  Pearl Harbor. The son of the man who owns the construction company offers to show Greg the island "sights" and do some surfing. Cindy and Bobby have a chance encounter with Don Ho. The girls all take in the shopping. Bobby even finds a cute little good luck charm at the construction site that he wears around his neck. The sun is shining, the birds are singing, it seems as if there is absolutely nothing that could spoil this idyllic family vacation...

Our Pilgrim Fathers' Thanksgiving Turkey

I love Thanksgiving and I love turkey. It is the easiest of meats to cook as long as you remember to clean it out first. Then, a little salt, some butter and into the roaster. The lengthy cooking time gives one the opportunity to reflect and to give thanks.  I am thankful for what we did have. The times at 8 Point, the "Real Live Brady Bunch," the Halloweens and Christmases, the can of beans in the mixer box, this cookbook, Paige and Andrew. All of the little times, and days, and conversations and our last trip to Chicago at Easter. The email I sent to him right before chemo telling him how much I loved him, his response saying the same to me. For all of the new and renewed friendships this experience has brought, and yes, even for Facebook. For every day, every moment, I am thankful for it all.

Episode Note: "The Un-underground Movie" Greg decides to make a film for his history project about the the first Thanksgiving. He enlists the help of the whole family to act in and to create elaborate sets and the costumes for the production. Too many cooks spoil the turkey, as it were, when everyone believes they also have a say in the creative direction of the film, making Greg wish he had never conceived the idea in the first place. Wanting to quit, but able to muster the same courage of the early settlers to carry on, Greg manages to reign in his out of line cast and crew. They wind up making an over dramatic cheesy silent movie of the suffering of the pilgrims through the harsh winter and failing crops and their relationship with the native Americans that culminates in the sharing of the first Thanksgiving meal. I gave thanks when it ended.

Grandma Connie's Shortbread

Shortbread cookies, just like grandma used to make. Okay, my grandmother never made these but I am sure some one's did. Flour, confectioner's sugar, and two sticks of butter mixed and rolled into a log and refrigerated for hour before being kneaded, rolled out and cut. Alice suggested using a round cookie cutter, but Julia and I used a pumpkin shape, 'tis the season after all. Baked for 20 minutes and cooled on a rack. Yes, she said to cool them on a rack. This makes me so proud of Alice, she's really come a long way since the "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia Muffins."

Episode Note: "You're Never Too Old"  A tour de force for Robert Reed and Florence Henderson, as they play their respective grand parents visiting from out of town. The episode must have been lobbied for by the make-up artist on the set, tired of only getting to tease Jan's wigs. Anyway, Mike and Carol go out of town and Mike's curmudgeon grandfather Hank, and Carol's fun loving grandmother, Connie, come to visit. At first, these two are like oil and water (when the lady met the fellow, it was way less than a hunch). But, the scheming children devise a plot to get the two oldies but goodies together, Hank loosening up and Connie taking things a bit more seriously. One wonders if this gave Robert Reed the compunction to go on to more dramatic roles, like Roots 2 (by a show of hands, who else was disturbed to see Mr Brady as a slave owner?) Anyway, of course the two old fogies become fond of one another and they elope to Vegas, making true that what happens at the Brady's, stays at the Brady's.

Garlic (No Vampire) Potatoes

Oven roasted new red potatoes (at 350 for two hours), then cut up and tossed with plenty of garlic. olive oil and salt and pepper.Yum. Nothing scary about this one. I actually made these last night and we had them with the "New House Pot Roast." They were very good and similar to mine, except I use rosemary instead of garlic. Oops, now you know my dirty little secret that sometimes I combine two recipes to make a meal and then take the next night off. Pay no attention to cook behind the curtain.

Episode Note: "Fright Night:" Two episode posts in a row, with almost identical plot lines. What are the chances? Well, pretty good that by season four, they were recycling plot lines from season one (how green of the producers). So, here we go again. We have Carol making a bust of Mike out of clay for an art class exhibit on Friday. Meanwhile, the boys have nothing better to do than try to frighten the girls with spooky noises in the night and ghostly images outside their window, making them feel as though the house is haunted. Mike and Carol dismiss their fears and the situation is "resolved." But the girls realize that the boys are behind the hijinx, and plot revenge. Then, all six decide to try to scare Alice while Mike and Carol are at the art show. Their best laid plans backfire when Mike and Carol happen upon the scene, and a terrified Alice smashes the bust of Mr Brady, thinking it is the head of a burglar. A classic parental lecture spews forth about the dangers of scaring people and the tragedy that potentially could have occurred. No allowance for two weeks is the punishment, putting a frightening end to the Brady Six's devil's night. Ooooh, scccarrryyy....

New House Pot Roast

I now have an incredibly close relationship with my local butcher as a result of this project. I think he's going to miss me, and Alice. If there was actually a Meatcutter's ball, I think I might get invited this year. Just sayin. Anyway, a rump roast browned on the cook top and then baked in the oven for three hours. Alice then had me make a gravy from the pan drippings, adding garlic, vinegar and tomato sauce in with the flour and the fat.
It was an excellent piece of meat.

Episode Note: "To Move, Or Not to Move" The whole family is complaining about the house being too small, too noisy, and not enough space or privacy, leading Mike and Carol to consider moving to a bigger house with separate girls and boys bathrooms. But, finding the right house that is affordable poses a problem. Alice tells Carol about an old house that has been empty for years that might work, because it is rumored to be haunted. Mike finds one that isn't haunted and makes an offer, they now just need to sell the house on Clinton Avenue. The only catch is that everyone has to change schools and make new friends, leaving the kids unsettled. The reminisce about all the good times in the house and begin to have buyer's remorse. Even Alice worries about moving too, not wanting to get used to a new kitchen. The kids decide to take matters into their own hands and rig up haunting noises to scare away potential buyers. Mike dismisses them as the house settling and women's runaway imaginations. When the buyer shows up, the kids go all out with noises and ghosts to frighten her away. In the end, everyone is relieved to be staying put, admitting that no one really wanted to move. Ah, but what will happen the next time someone wants their own room, that is the question.

Yuletide Pepper Salad

Here's one that I really wasn't looking forward to, just reading the recipe it sounded bad, even though the ingredients each on their own appeal to me. But together, not so much. White rice, sliced red and green peppers and a vinaigrette of Dijon, oil and white wine vinegar, tossed together. I used the rest of the box of converted rice, as my pantry is beginning to be quite full of half used "specialty" items, sort of like the ghosts of recipes past. Alice allowed for it to be served cold or at room temp, I opted for cold, like my revenge. I also went out on a limb and tossed in the rest of the artichoke hearts I had leftover from last night, a nice touch if I do say so myself. It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas.....

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Episode Note: "The Voice of Christmas" [I will admit that this was a "lost" episode as far I am concerned. I swear I had never seen it growing up, and six months ago if you had asked me if there was a Christmas episode I would have vehemently said no, and possibly bet money or some other tangible item in defense of my position.]  It's Christmastime, and there is a flurry of activity at the Brady residence, decorating the tree, shopping for presents, etc. The holiday is to culminate with a Christmas morning church service with Carol doing a solo of  "O' Come Ye Faithful." But tragedy strikes when she comes down with laryngitis a few days before. All hope seems to be lost that she'll be able to sing and the kids feel as though Christmas is ruined. Little lisping Cindy decides to take matters into her own hands and pleads to the big man himself, the department store Santa, to restore her mother's voice. Mike tries to explain that might be beyond Santa's bailiwick, but Cindy disagrees, saying Santa can do anything. With the family so glum, and Carol bedridden, it is up to Alice to explain to the kids what Christmas is really all about. They rally, and so does Carol, Cindy's wish come true. In the end, they celebrate a very Brady Christmas morning at home, and Carol sings like an angel at church. I believe, I believe, it's silly but I believe....

Psychedelic Pad Paella

This recipe in no way whatsoever resembles how I make paella. I highly doubt anyone actually would make it this way. First, the rice. Traditionally, Paella calls for Valencia or Arborio rice, but Alice insists that I used converted rice, which goes against the grain so to speak. Then, she wants me to put pork chops in. Yes, pork chops, not andouille sausage the way I do it, but pork chops. Oh, and artichoke hearts, which I have never heard of in paella. The rest of the ingredients are fairly standard: chicken, shrimp, peppers, peas, saffron, chicken broth. Her method of cooking it varies as well. I use a paella (which is Spanish for "pan." I used to call it my paella pan, but then realized I was saying pan pan and had to stop because that sounds like I am ordering cheap pizza). Anyway, she wanted me to throw it all into a dutch oven and let it simmer until the liquid was absorbed. It was better than I expected, but that's not always saying much when it comes to Alice.

Episode Note: "Our Son the Man" Starting high school has given Greg the 'treat me like a man, I need my own room' blues when an older girl at school dismisses him for being a square. Wait just a minute you say, he gets the attic room, but no I say, this is two seasons earlier and the attic is described as being three feet tall. (I am beginning to suspect that no one was in charge of continuity on the set). Anyway, after much discussion Mike gives up his den and Greg turns it into a hippie pad, complete with black light and beaded curtains, oh and rock music, the only thing missing is LSD. He also gives himself a makeover (think "New Greg Brady") and dons groovy threads (think fringe vest, head band, bell bottoms and reflector sunglasses). Sadly, all of his efforts to grow up and get hip don't succeed in getting the older girl to notice. He even opts out of the family camping trip so he can stay home and hang with his new homies who don't actually exist. In the end he chucks his new image and returns to the family fold. But wait you say, we saw that before too with "Johnny Bravo." Yes, I say, but that is two seasons away as well. I feel like I'm tripping just trying to keep it all straight.

Safety Monitor Stroganoff

This is another new one for me. I have never made Beef Stroganoff probably because it contains sour cream and I was under the twenty year impression that it was a no-no in our house. But now it isn't, so I combined the sour cream, tomato paste Worcestershire sauce, Dijon mustard, paprika and salt and pepper (to taste) and simmered for 20 minutes then removed from the heat and let it stand. Meanwhile, I sauteed sliced white mushrooms, set them aside and then browned the the beef tips and set them aside.I then returned the sour cream mixture to a simmer, added the mushrooms then added the beef until heated through. Served over egg noodles (which I now swear by NoYolks). Not bad, I'd let it off with a warning.

Episode Note: "Law and Disorder" Bobby takes his post as School Safety Monitor to the extreme. So much so, that his enforcement of the rules has alienated both his friends and family.  At first, he's not so enthused about being "class cop," but after a lecture about responsibility and the importance of enforcing the rules, likening him to a police officer, from Mike and Carol, Bobby is good to go. He studies the rules religiously so as to be able to crack down in the school yard. He writes tickets like the paper grows on trees for gum chewing, littering, and disorderly conduct in the hallways. Meanwhile, Mike brings home an old wooden row boat  and the Brady's set about to make it seaworthy. After issuing Cindy a moving violation for running in the hall, things go from bad to worse. Bobby turns his attention to enforcing the rules at home as well. He tries to explain that he's just doing his duty, but it falls on deaf ears. He begins compiling a weekly report for Mike and Carol on all the Brady rule breaking. Bobby has become what everyone in the family despises: a rat fink. Busting others is easy, but then Bobby finds himself in a rule breaking situation when a girl named Jill asks him to rescue her cat Pandora from an abandoned building clearly labeled 'KEEP OUT.' He successfully performs his role as first responder, but gets his good clothes filthy in the process. Trying to cover up his act, he puts his suit and a whole box of laundry detergent in the washer (that's always funny when suds are everywhere). He admits to breaking a rule, but Mike and Carol explain that some rule breaking is ok and they no longer want him enforcing the law at home, saying he has taken it too far. Talk about a mixed message. He doesn't even get a punishment, apparently his two wrongs made a right somehow. Mutiny on the SS Brady is narrowly avoided.

Poison Apple Cider

Grown-up apple cider at its finest. Black tea, brewed and strained over sugar. Once the sugar is dissolved, orange juice, brandy and the cider are added. Garnished with  lemon. I have occasionly wondered if Alice was a closet drinker, nipping at the cooking sherry, but now we know she likes her brandy disguised as apple cider. As an aside, I am down to the final eight recipes.

Episode Note: "Snow White and the Seven Brady's" Cindy's beloved teacher is retiring and the class wants to buy her an expensive gift. Not having the funds to do so, Cindy suggests that they put on a play to raise money. All is well until a snafu results in the theatre being double booked and Cindy has no venue. But the show must go on and the Brady's brainstorm and decide to do it in their own backyard. They elect to perform Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, leaving Cindy with two casting problems: first, their are only six Brady children (Mike is Prince Charming, Carol is Snow White and Alice is the evil queen) and second, each of them want to be Dopey (leaving that one alone). They draw Dwarf names from a hat, and no one gets Dopey. Sam comes to the rescue, making a house call meat delivery just at that moment and he gets the coveted role. Tickets are sold, the stage and costumes are created, lines are rehearsed again and again. The rub comes the day of the show when Alice realizes that she has rehearsed the poison apple scene so many times that she's out of apples, causing Mike and Sam, in full Prince and Dopey costume to drive to the market to get more apples. A police officer intervenes when they double park and neither has any identification (no pockets in tights). They explain the whole play concept trying to get out of the jam, only further getting them into trouble when the officer inquires as to whether or not they have a permit to sell tickets (damn government intrusion). They manage to iron things out by inviting the policeman and his children to attend the performance (LAPD respond well to bribery) and the show goes without a hitch. Mirror, Mirror on the wall, is this the dopiest episode of all?

Misunderstanding Mashed Potato Cakes

I don't think I get this. Cold mashed potatoes (Alice didn't tell me how to get them) mixed with butter and flour, then turned onto a floured surface, rolled out (which was impossible), cut into "fun" shapes (her idea of a joke) and fried on a griddle for 3 minutes per side. Yes, you read that correctly. Well, as you can tell from the photo, the shapes weren't very fun, but they started out as pumpkins, butterflies and ice cream cones, I kid you not. Taste wise, we all agreed that they were edible, but a waste of some good mashed potatoes, which are a staple in our house. Perhaps I just misunderstood Alice's intent. It is clear, I shall be tested until the bitter end.

Episode Note: "Goodbye Alice, Hello" (Sometimes known as the "Kay" episode in super fan circles) A series of unfortunate events leads the kids to give Alice the silent treatment. She reluctantly rats Greg and Peter out for breaking a lamp (turns out Mom never said not to toss a Frisbee in the house) and also innocently squeals on Marcia for leaving the record player on. Feeling as though she irreparably breached their trust, and is no longer a friend to the kids, Alice resigns. Heartbroken, she has decided that it is finally time to move on. She gets a more than suitable replacement in Kay, her housekeeper BFF. Kay is all cooking and cleaning and no small talk. She believes not to get involved personally with the family who employs her. The contrast between jovial, fun loving Alice and staid Kay becomes startling to the kids. They begin to long for the old days (two days prior) and  Alice. Feeling remorse for treating her poorly, they get Kay to tell them where Alice  is, and track her down at a local diner, where she is a waitress. They convince Alice that they do love her and want her back. She clicks her heels together and returns to the Brady household, knowing that there's no place like home.

Double Trouble Cookies

Nothing troubles me about these cookies, really nothing troubles me about cookies in general. Flour, sugar (white and brown), peanut butter, egg, baking soda, butter and two kinds of chips: chocolate and peanut butter. This would have been a dessert trifecta for Denni, cookies, chocolate and peanut butter, three of his favs rolled (well, really dropped by the spoonful) into one. Twice as good as regular cookies, and no two looked exactly the same.

Episode Note: "Two Petes in a Pod" A double shark jump when Peter discovers the new kid at school, Arthur Owens, is his doppelganger. At first, it is all fun and games as they pretend to be each other, fooling teachers, friends and family. But, Arthur throws a wrench into the frivolity when, posing as Peter, makes a date with Pamela to go to a costume party. At the same time, Peter as Peter makes a date with Michelle for the same night to come over and hang out. Peter, doesn't want to break either date, especially since Pamela is Mr. Phillips' niece, and he doesn't want to let on to his parents what he and Arthur have been up to. They devise a plot to have "Peter" go on both dates. Arthur is to come over and as Peter entertain Pamela, while Peter goes out with Michelle. The plan is a almost fool-proof except for Arthur is late and both girls arrive before he does. Peter does his best to run back and forth between the living room and family room, taking off and putting on his Dracula costume in between until Arthur shows up. All is well and Peter and Michelle are about to leave, when Mike and Carol unexpectedly come home and find two of Peter, forcing Peter to tell the truth to the girls and his parents about he and Arthur. The girls don't seem to mind, and the parents seem unfazed by the double vision, it being the 70s and all.

Westdale High Family Frolics Frittata

This is sort of like breakfast for dinner in one dish: eggs, ham cheese and potato baked together. First, Alice had me quarter white potatoes and boil for 15 minutes and then drain, cool and sliced. Then, in a baking dish I layered  the ham and the potatoes. In a separate bowl I beat six eggs and added herbs and salt and pepper and then poured that over the ham and potatoes, followed by some shredded Gruyere. Baked for 25 minutes or until golden brown (yes, she is always that precise). The consensus was that is was okay, but my breakfast strada is better. I say strada, Alice says frittata, let's call the whole thing off.

Episode Note: "The Show Must Go On?"  We find Greg and Marcia both having volunteered their parents to perform in the Westdale High Family Night Frolics talent show. Needless to say, Carol is less than thrilled at at the notion of singing in public, and as Mike tries to convince her to do it he gets roped into performing with Greg. Everyone chips in to sell tickets and Alice volunteers to take some down to Sam at the butcher shop. All is well, especially since chicken livers are on sale for 69 cents a pound, until Alice discovers Sam would rather go bowling than take her to the Frolics. A fight ensues and they break up. Alice is down in the dumps at home, and Jan and Cindy take matters into their own hands and decide to make Sam jealous by convincing him that Alice is cheating on him. This doesn't sit well with Sam, and he demands that Alice allow him to take her to the show. Nothing like young girls lying and manipulating so a woman can get her man. Anyway, Carol and Marcia perform "Together" from Gypsy and Mike does a dramatic reading accompanied by Greg on the guitar, spicing it up with a comic gag routine involving Peter and Bobby dropping feathers and water from the cat walk to much laughter from the audience. The show is a rousing success. Remember when you were a kid and thought if you and your mother could just do a song and dance routine together dressed as hobos everything would be grand? Yeah, me too.

Lost Locket Lentil Soup

I have never made lentil soup, or anything with lentils before today. Got some great advice while out to lunch with my docent friends, which sadly I cannot use because I must follow Alice's orders. So, bacon (a good start for any recipe) sauteed and then removed from the pan and its place carrots, onions and garlic cooked in the rendered fat. Chicken stock, thyme, bay leaves and the lentils are added and brought to a boil and then covered and simmered for 45 minutes. The bacon is added at the end. To begin and end with bacon is always a good thing, but the soup itself not so great. Luckily, we still have ice cream pie...

Episode Note: "Lost, Locket, Found Locket" So far we've seen Jan play not so funny jokes, wear a crazy wig, try to remove freckles, worry that she'll look like a  kook when she's older, exclaim "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia," become the most popular unpopular girl in school, fail miserably at the performing arts, and wish to be an only child. Today completes the Jan story arc when she once again is depressed over the lack of attention she is getting at home (Note to the reader: I've given up on the tirades of the injustice served to this poor girl at every turn and will just relay the story).  She receives an anonymous package in the mail from "nobody" that contains a locket. Jan is delighted with her gift, but mystified as to who might have sent it. This sets off attempts by the whole family to get to the bottom of the mystery sender, apparently suspicious of anyone being nice to Jan. Greg, after examining the address label notices that the typewriter used drops its "Ys" and this becomes the overriding clue. Carol and Mike immediately suspect one another, leading Carol and Alice to sneak into Mike's office after hours with flashlights to check his typewriter and its "Ys". Meanwhile, at home alone, Mike also checks Carol's portable (typewriter, that is) for its "Ys". Both schemes fail to yield results. But then, an even bigger mystery occurs. Jan, while sleeping, wakes to find her locket is gone! This leaves her even more depressed than before, if that is possible. The family shifts focus from who sent the locket, to finding the locket. Greg suggests an reenactment, like on TV, setting into motion all the events leading up to the locket's disappearance. That is when Jan remembers that she was leaning out the window just before going to bed the night it vanished and thus the locket is found outside the window hanging on the ivy.  With the locket found, and the heat off as far as discovering who sent it, Alice confides in Jan that she is in fact the "nobody". She sent it, because as a middle sister herself, she knows all to well what it's like to be nobody in a family and wanted Jan to feel special for once. Alas, Alice feels not only Jan's pain, but mine as well.

Own Room Manicotti

I was actually looking forward to this recipe (an anomaly I know), as I have never made stuffed manicotti before but was always tempted by the large shells in the pasta aisle. So, a mix of ricotta and mozzarella cheeses, stuffed into the cooked manicotti (which is harder than it sounds and I am thinking about trying my hand at sausage next) and placed in a baking dish layered first with tomato sauce. A second layer of sauce goes on top, with a sprinkle of Parmesan cheese and into the oven for 45 minutes. One really can''t go wrong with tomatoey, cheesy, pasta goodness, not even Alice.

Episode Note: "A Room at the Top" Who knew the Brady's had an attic? You would think by the fourth season the lines of communication between Mike and Carol may have improved. But, they haven't. It all starts when Greg is feeling cramped and childish sharing a room with his two younger brothers and a friend asks if he wants to move out on his own and share an apartment. Mike and Carol nix that idea, but Mike tells Greg he can have the attic for his own. Meanwhile, Marcia gets the "own room I need more privacy" bug, and Carol tells her she can have the attic for her own room. Comedy ensues when the boys start to bring Greg's stuff upstairs and the girls do likewise with Marcia's. As a result Greg and Marcia argue, both asserting that they have permisssion to use the room. But Greg is the stand-up guy, and gives the room to Marcia when he hears her tearful pleas for privacy to her sisters. This turn of events irks Bobby and Peter who want Greg out and they conspire to annoy Marcia to give up the room. Marcia accuses Greg of playing dirty tricks, but ultimately concedes the space to him (thank goodness, because Greg never could have had Raquel spend the night in the boys room) since he is the oldest and will be leaving for college soon. Greg turns the attic into a room of his own. And for once, Greg, not Marcia, ends up on top.

Sore Throat Ice Cream Pie

Pumpkin ice cream pie, a perfect anecdote to a chilly October day. I love pumpkin pie, and pumpkin muffins, and pumpkin donuts, but have never had it in an ice cream pie form. Normally when we make pies (and I say we, but I really mean Mark) "we" make our own crust. Mark makes the most delicious, perfect pie crust, but today Alice told me to use a pre-made store bought crust. And I follow her orders. So, canned pumpkin, vanilla ice cream, nutmeg and cinnamon blended together and put into the baked crust, then frozen.

Episode note: "Coming Out Party" Mr. Phillips invites the entire Brady clan, including Alice for a day of deep sea fishing on his boat. Everyone is excited for the excursion, except for Alice who gets seasick. Mike warns the kids to stay healthy, but of course Cindy starts sneezing immediately. The sneezes turn into a fever and and soon Dr. Howard (not Cameron or Porter) makes a house call and delivers the bad news, Cindy needs to have her tonsils removed and wants to schedule the surgery for Saturday - the day of the boat trip. The family is disappointed, especially since Peter and Greg went to great lengths to get Alice use to the motion in the ocean by rigging up a plank between two rocking chairs. Anyway, Mike manages to reschedule the trip for the following weekend and there is much rejoicing. Meanwhile, when Cindy is being rechecked by the doctor, she refuses to open wide and say aahh. Carol demonstrates the technique, leading Dr. Howard to determine that she too needs to have her tonsils removed. They both have the operation and are at home resting with strict orders not to speak. But when Mike telephones and Alice is out, Carol answers making Mike angry. She promises not to do it again, so he tests her by calling back, and of course she answers, getting her angry at his trick. The third time is not the charm when the phone rings, as Carol is ready to give Mike a dose of his own medicine, but it is in fact Mr. Phillips calling. Carol, still thinking it is Mike trying to trick her, tells him his boat  is a broken down barnacle barge and hangs up. This leaves Mike with some splaining to do down at the office. Once the mess is cleared up the trip goes as planned (cue some stock footage of a sail boat on the ocean) and all but Alice have a real good time. She's unable to answer the call of the sea, having lost her lunch at the sight of the marina.

Scheming Scalloped Potatoes

I love all potatoes. There is nothing you can do to a poato to get me not to like it. And tonight Alice does us a solid. Peeled and sliced white potatoes (although she didn't specify type), artfully arranged in a casserole dish, drowned in heavy cream and butter, of course, and baked.

Episode Note: "Alice's September Song" Alice, tired of her hum drum going no where relationship with Sam, is swept off of her feet when her old flame Mark Mallard swoops into town. Sweet talking Mark wines and dines Alice every night and brings her flowers every day, much to the chagrin of Sam. Alice is on cloud nine feeling like a school girl again, but Mike and Carol become suspicious of  Mark and aim to get to the bottom of his true intentions towards their beloved Alice. Although, it seems more like they don't want to lose their housekeeper than protect Alice from a cad, which is what Mark turns out to be. After several dates, he begins to inquire as to Alice's finances and tells her of an "investment opportunity" that is too good to pass up, and sadly too good to be true. Mike has a friend down at the police department check into Mallard's past and finds out he has been conning old maids out of their money for years. Mike and Carol break the news to Alice, who is crestfallen. Sam shows up, professes his true feelings for Alice, saying " Alice is my inspiration, I see her face in every bowling ball, her figure in every bowling pin" and sends Mark Mallard packing. Leaving Alice to spend the rest of her days waiting for the last pin to drop.